I often talk to parents about the relationship they want to have with their children.  Are you of the old school, where children are to be seen and not heard?  Are you of the new school, where we should all be BFF–friends who don’t even try to teach right from wrong?  Would you prefer to be somewhere in the middle?

I recently read the following article by a CNN analyst.  I think EVERY parent of a young girl needs to read this article and take note.

http://www.cnn.com/2011/OPINION/04/19/granderson.children.dress/index.html?hpt=C2

As a preschool teacher, I have marveled (or observed in horror) as toddlers came to school in “darling” outfits of midriff tops and short shorts with their diapers hanging out.  I’ve tried to help the 4-year-old who can’t keep the spaghetti straps up on her shoulders as she tries to work.  I’ve provided longer shirts so a 5-year-old could climb on the playground without her bottom showing.  And every time I wonder about the parent who purchased these outfits.  Are we starting to treat our little girls as dolls, to be dressed up for show?  Are we imposing our wishes to be young and beautiful on a child who just wants the freedom to play?  Are we so brain-washed by the media that we believe this is how a girl should look?  The author of the above article raises excellent questions about the genesis of these clothes for children.  He also asks some serious questions of the parents and sets some expectations of how a parent should act.

If you were appalled by the description at the beginning of the article, stop and take a hard look at your own daughter.  Are you behaving like a friend or a parent?  Are you teaching her how to dress and behave like the confident, successful young woman you hope she will be?   Or are you letting our current social norms dictate those behaviors?  Ten years from now, will you be thrilled to see her dressed as she is?  Or will you be asking her to change into something more conservative?    For what target market are you preparing her?  Successful career-makers?  Or dance club dates?

Make a conscious decision to parent now and revel in being a friend with the wonderful young adult who will emerge later!